Could Artificial Intelligence Help Father Christmas?

How can Artificial Intelligence help Father Christmas?


We’ve always believed that AI has the potential to enhance many aspects of our lives and our world. From helping you sleep better to mitigating natural disasters, AI can bring benefits close to home and further away too. But could Artificial Intelligence even help Father Christmas? After all, this is the man with the most important job in the entire world – delivering happiness to others. Could AI help him to do his job better and get it right more of the time? Well, let’s take a look.

Father Christmas has a tricky gig. Take, for example, making sure his naughty and nice lists are correct. Keeping on top of that goes right to the wire when he’s climbing in his sleigh. If he used AI it could analyse behaviour well in advance of Christmas Eve and provide him with his naughty and nice lists much earlier. That’s such a great thing for everyone too. Now you know you can’t get away with being naughty closer to the festive season and hope to get away with it. Father Christmas will be aware of that – so you have to change your habits otherwise it’s no present for you.

By being able to analyse who is naughty or nice in advance, Father Christmas can also review his toy production facility. Up till now, the elves would be frantic right up to their shipment deadline. They have to continually stop and restart production, which makes a mess of trying to reach any economies of scale. But with AI’s insight they can plan ahead much better and optimise toy production. Much less stress for the elves!

Now let’s look at his transport. The Christmas Sleigh GTR-X is reindeer powered, recently upgraded with additional hoofs and a high-lumens red beacon for better night-time flying. The power units –  Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen and the newbie Rudolph – all need to be ready for a frantic 24 hours. They tend to look after their own maintenance ahead of the big day, but F Christmas needs to be sure they’re all going to pull their weight. With AI, he can monitor their diets better and see which need to change eating patterns. This would be really useful, not least because Vixen does have a habit of turning up overweight and slowing the sleigh down. It would help Rudolph too, by telling him what to eat ahead of Christmas Eve to make his nose really bright red.

How else could artificial intelligence help Father Christmas? Well, his journey round the world is currently based on an average speed in flight combined with allocating the same time to each property he visits. But AI could make this much more efficient, simply by analysing known data . This includes the proximity of chimneys next to each other, the quantity of treats left out for him (and thus the delay in consuming them) and the distances he has to travel between locations. All this information would then map out a more efficient route that conserves time and energy where needed. It could even take account of the sherry he drinks (he’s a big drinker, Father Christmas) and automate sections of his flight time to let him sober up. Don’t let anyone tell you AI can’t be caring.

But the big benefit of AI for Father Christmas is how it would make people happier. Presents delivered faster and more accurately, plus those treats get the quality time they deserve. So if anyone asks you could Artificial Intelligence help Father Christmas, just show them this article. In fact, I think we need to have a chat with the man himself. Anyone got his address?


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